At the hairdresser's

Sorry for delay of this translation. There is no time...this contribution is connected with my photo below the pictures from Malaga.
So, before reading, make a cup of tea because this is a long haidresser's story.
Because there was a need to shorten the field on my head I set off to the hairdresser's in Malaga. Normal price for cutting the hair is 15E in which can be included also washing and combing of hair, massage and other, price can increase up to 50E. So I was peeping about the prices at the haidresser's screens in the city. I liked one which had separated prices to cutting and the other, for cutting they wanted "just" 8E. After a short preparation with the Spanish dictionary I got to it.
The servis was puzzling from the beginning. There was a doorknob on the door from outside so as I tried to get inside a small, about 40 years old Vietnamese came to open the door. After classic "hola" she asked "cortar? [cut hair?]". As a native speaker I shot off "sí". In the room which didn't look like other haidresser's I had visited before was sitting one more young Vietnamese-guy and one Vietnames-women which could speak a little spanish as I realized later. Under the ceiling there was hanging TV in the corner where was going some Vietnamese action movie that time.
The women showed me the chair where I set down. With a strange Spanish I told her that I was a stranger so I didn't speak good Spanish. She nodded and probably thought that I was talking about her and told me that she "speaks a little". To my surprise she didn't ask how I want to be cut. She directly filled her palm with a shampoo and started to wash my head. Actually it was a massage. Everything was going on without a word in the background of the Vietnamese movie, from time to time the guy who was staring at me all the time sang quietly some song in mother language.
After scrubbing my head she moved me with the gestures to the wash basin where she washed my head and then I moved back to the chair. At a time she started to massage my head, neck and back so (with an idea of the huge bill) I told her that I just wanted to cut hair. She only grinned. The second women nodded to me at the mirror with a word "masaje [massage]". That moment I gave up everything. Firstly I was scared of the talk in Spanish but for Vietnamese language I wasn't prepared at all.
After five minutes long massage came my moment. During previous cure I forgot all the prepared words, but they would be anyway useless. I simply showed how long it should be and she began without saying a word. The scissors was probably after her grandmother but it wasn't a problem because most of the work she managed with a machine without any extension piece. Then she shaved my neck with a dry cutthroat razor, this time I rather didn't look in the mirror. After she found it finished she took me again to the wash-basin and washed my hair and then she dried the hair with a drier of the small harpoon size. Finally she found in the drawer the Vietnamese gel (probably from old reserves) which looked like a lipstick in the plastic hollow cylinder about 8cm in diameter and ran with it across my head till it was totally slimy. That time I was just thinking how I explain to the guy that I have just 20E with me and that I just wanted to cut the hair. After all the woman's gesture took me out of the chair, in the room appeared new old women who clinked the cash desk and on the display appeared 9.50E.
With an ease I went back to the flat where I was trying to wash away the waxy layer from my head, finally I removed it partially with the towel. As I was telling the story to Jitka, she had the spasms of laughing in her stomach and told me to write it down here...and she added that the haircut looked finally quite cool. You can judge on the photo below.
At the end one addition. Now it is two weeks from the story happened. Yesterday I was passing by that hairdresser's and it was canceled.

Pár fotek z Malagy (A few pictures from Malaga)

U holiče

Uvařte si šálek kávy nebo čaje, dejte si na hlavu čepici a zkute si představit, že jste u holiče.
Protože bylo potřeba zkrátit narostenou řepu na hlavě, vydal jsem se v Malaze k holiči. Běžná cena za ostříhání je nad 15E, v čemž bývá většinou ještě mytí vlasů, učesání, masáž a kdovíco všechno, cena se pak stupňuje. Takže jsem poslední týden pokukoval po výlohách holičství, kde by se vlasů dalo zbavit nejlevněji. Vyhlídl jsem si jedno, kde měli rozdělené ceny zvlášť, pouze za ostříhání chtěli "jen" 8E. To se mi líbilo, takže jsem po krátké přípravě se španělským slovníčkem vlezl dovnitř.

Od začátku byl servis pochybný. Na dveřích byla zvenku koule, takže když jsem se začal dobývat dovnitř, přišla mi otevřít malá, asi čtyřicetiletá vietnamka. Po klasickém "hola" z ní vypadla otázka "cortar? [stříhat?]". Mazácky jsem vystřelil "sí". V místnosti, která nevypadala jako většina holičství, ve kterých jsem byl, seděl ještě jeden mladý vietnamec, a jedna vietnamka, která, jak jsem časem zjistil uměla trochu španělsky. V rohu visela u stropu zaplá televize, právě běžel nějaký vietnamský akční film.

Takže mi vietnamská holička naznačila rukou směr křeslo, kam jsem se posadil. Vypravil jsem ze sebe lámanou španělštinou, že jsem cizinec a tedy neumím dobře španělsky. Vietnamka na mě přikývla, asi si myslela že mluvím o ní a sdělila mi že "trochu mluví". K mému překvapení se nezeptala jak to chci. Rovnou si mrskla plnou dlaň šampónu a začla mi drhnout hlavu. V podstatě šlo o masáž. Všechno probíhalo beze slova s kulisou vietnamského filmu, občas si vietnamec, který si mě celou dobu prohlížel, něco pobrukoval v rodném jazyce.
Posunky mě po vydrhnutí přepravila k umyvadýlku, kde mi hlavu opláchla, pak jsem se přesunul zpět do křesla. V tom mi opět beze slova začla masírovat hlavu, krk, záda, trochu vyděšeně jsem jí s vidinou masného účtu sdělil, že jsem chtěl jen ostříhat. Jen se zašklebila. Druhá vietnamka na mě do zrcadla přikývla se slovem "masache [masáž]". V tu chvíli jsem rezignoval. Bál jsem se domluvy ve španělštině, ale s vietnamštinou jsem původně nepočítal vůbec.
Po pětiminutové masáži přišla moje chvíle. Během předešlých úkonů jsem ale zapomněl všechny připravené slovíčka, ale ty by mi byly stejně k ničemu. Prostě jsem ukázal jak dlouhé to má být a vietnamka se beze slova dala do práce. Nůžky měla asi po babičce, ale většinu zvládla stejně strojkem bez jakýchkoli nástavců. Pak mi vzala krk suchou břitvou, to jsem se radši do zrcadla nedíval. Když bylo podle jejího hotovo, opláchla mi zas hlavu v umyvadýlku, osušila fénem velikosti malé harpuny. Nakonec vytáhla asi ze starých zásob vietnamský gel, který vypadal spíš jako jelení lůj v plastovém dutém válečku o průměru asi osm centimetrů. Tím mi začala jezdit po hlavě, až jsem ji měl totálně oslizlou. V tu dobu už jsem jen přemýšlel jak připravenému vietnamcovi vysvětlím, že mám u sebe jen 20E, že jsem chtěl jen ostříhat. Nakonec mi bylo gestem naznačeno, že můžu slézt ze židle, v místnosti se objevila další zcvrklá vietnamka ve stylu "hlídač Pokladu na Stříbrném jezeře", která cinkla do pokladny a vyskočilo na mě číslo 9,50.
S úlevou jsem se vrátil na byt, kde jsem se chvíli pokoušel ve sprše smýt voskovou vrstvu z hlavy, pak jsem to částečně odstranil ručníkem (zkuste si nakapat vosk na vlasy a pak to dostat dolů). Když jsem anabázi u holiče vyprávěl Jitce, tak se jen válela smíchy a řekla ať to sem napíšu...a zhodnotila, že to nakonec vypadá docela dobře. Zhodnoťte sami.

Santa Semana

Nearly fortnight of vacancies is out. Spanish can enjoy the vacancies more than us because their holiday begin on Friday a week before Easter Monday. What happens that time in the streets is partially recorded on the pictures and I add also two videos.
As I mentioned before, most of Spanish are believers and the big part are strong ones. I won't expand about the meaning of what had been happening here last week because I do not exactly know it. Simply, streets of Malaga, especially the centre filled the processions of confessants who convoyed the thrones with the Bible's features and following by the groups of musicians playing characteristic music. These processions that began at their churches (where they also finished) were criss-crossing the streets from the afternoon till the early morning. They arrived under our balcony at 4:30 am every day and interrupted our sleep (thank you Jesus). All the more the confessants were carrying the candles so the city is under the layer of wax now, I wonder who will clean it. Children with the wax balls were rushing behind the confessants who supplied their balls with the candle wax (see pictures), I do not know why.
On Holy Thursday Spanish army was criss-crossing the crowded streets of the city, I liked this very much (see video).

Santa Semana

Skoro čtrnáct dní prázdnin je v tahu. Španěláci si v tomhle směru užívají víc než my, prázdniny mají od pátku týden před Velikonocema až do Velikonočního pondělí. Co se tou dobou děje v ulicích je částečně zdokumentováno na fotkách a přidal jsem i dvě videa.
Jak už jsem se zmínil, většina španělů je věřících a velká část zřejmě silně. Nebudu se rozepisovat o významu toho co se tu minulý týden dělo, ptotože ani sám nevím přesný účel. Prostě ulice Malagy, speciálně centrum zaplavily průvody kajícníků, kteří doprovázeli trůny s biblickýma postavama, do toho všeho hrála mobilní kapela charakteristickou hudbu. Jenže místní nejsou žádní troškaři, takže průvody, které vycházely z jednotlivých kostelů (kam se nakonec i vracely) křižovaly ulice celý týden od odpoledne do ranních hodin, pod náš balkon se vždycky dostali v půl páté ráno, takže jsme spánkový deficit jak bylo původně plánováno, nedohnali (v tom rámusu se prostě spát nedá, Pane Ukřižovaný!). Kajícníci navíc nosili svíčky, takže je teďka město pod vrstvou vosku, zajímalo by mě kdo to bude pucovat. Za svíčkařema běhaly děti s voskovýma kuličkama, a nechaly si na ně přikapávat (viz foto), nevím proč.
Na zelený čtvrtek vyhnali španělskou gardu, která pak celé odpoledne křižovala ulice, to se mi líbilo nejvíc, fakt to štrádovali hezky, za přihlížení tísíců lidí v ulicích (viz video).

Other country, other manners

I am going to serve a few interesting or maybe different habits and things that I noticed in more than two months in Spain.
I could speak a lot about transport. There exist about a million of bus companies, each goes to other village. There doesn't exist any overall schedule not even a connection finder. Besides this fact, buses do not go everywhere so if you want to go hiking to the mountains (which are very nice and worthful to see in Andalusia) without car you are out. I will rather not talk about trains, the density of the railway network is very small. The buses stop for sign so it is to be on the lookout. I mentioned the mountain hiking. The guides and maps are done in similar way like the bus schedule. One interesting thing from the roads. In fact there are only on-way roads so if you turn to the wrong direction, you can't get back easilly. All transport on the roads isn't reined so the drivers go against red, especially pedestrians do not make difference between the colours.
Now something about restaurants. There are lots of pubs winehouses including where you are served just on the bar without any chairs (from the worst pubs to the smart restaurants). Sometimes it makes quite nice atmosphere. It is normal that people go to the pub to have a baguette with butter and salami. In most of the pubs the dried pig legs hang on the hooks. Normal dose of beer is 2dl.
Very good business in Spain must be tobacco. There could be about 90% of smokers here. Smoking is so common, that even at the official departments, shops and school classrooms are signs "don't smoke here, please", in front of the shops and other buildings are ashtrays of various types.
Spanish are crazy of clean pavements, they clean them many times a day in front of their houses, shops. But do not raise your head walking along the street or you step into the dogshit.
There are no names on the bells and postboxes, the post is pushed under the entrance door either of block of flats. There is no central distribution of gas so the streets are full of butan-bottles. Central heating is not a standard in the houses so we had to buy a small electric heater (this year was very cold winter with average temperature of 10C).
I do not know whether the betting of Spanish have something in common with the fact most of them are believers, but if I count the number of the lot-stalls and sellers of them in the streets, I think most of Spanish must be gamblers.
Siesta does really exist so do not go to shopping between 1 and 5 pm.
People are used to high temperatures so they go well dressed and they dress also the dogs even in temperature of 15C. The girls' trousers-fashion is awful (see the picture).
Spanish are quite small, about 165cm in average. The postcard stamps are self-adhesive so you do not have to lick them before using.
Finally one bonus. I do not know how do the ID cards of them look like, but instead of "cheese" they say "patata [potato]" while taking pictures.